I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
