Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
