Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize