it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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