There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize