So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
