the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I just googled if crying burns calories
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
