Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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