my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
