My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
