...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
