laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
