Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
