She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
