U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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