wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Randomize