oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
