Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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