I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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