my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize
