the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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