You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Randomize
