I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize