So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
