I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Boobs are out for the taking
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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