id be glad to
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
