Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
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and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
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Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Maybe he injected his testicle?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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