what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
