best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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