and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
