he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
a search helicopter?!
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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