mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
