Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
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