its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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