worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
