Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
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