what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
It's shark week go big or go home
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
