Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize