My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
