My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
