Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Randomize
