Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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