If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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