So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
