so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize