I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
He felt like a one man threesome
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
