Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
So vagazzling was a success
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
