That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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