margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize