This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
