Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
